Pearson Preferred

I have been going by Pearson since my first few days at The University of Mississippi. If you would like to know why, feel free to ask me or read a previous narrative that I’ve written on my preference.

 

I don’t go into detail here on why I prefer to be addressed as Pearson because that’s not so much what this narrative is about.

 

 

This narrative is more about the reason, regardless of the my why, you and everyone else that I introduce myself to or receives a signature addressed email from me shouldn’t need a reason to respect my preference.

 

 

Let me be clear. I am not saying that the reason is not important—it is.

While unfortunate, it’s one of the most important narratives that has shaped my life. And if you want to know, I am happy to share how much Ashley’s life and death impacted my life and career path.

 

But what I am saying is that when you choose not to address me by that name and I correct you, I do not owe you an explanation.

 

 

You don’t get to decide if you’re going to use it or if you’re not.

 

If you’re reading this and thinking “is she writing about me & that one time I addressed her as Courtney” the answer is YES.

 

If you’re reading this and thinking “she’s being awfully harsh” allow me to unpack this for you.

 

When you do not call me Pearson,

You’re prescribing yourself a particular privilege as a childhood friend, a close friend, a member of the beloved AME church I was raised in, or family member— a privilege you have not earned nor do you deserve.

 

When you do not call me Pearson,

You’re asserting your power and privilege by insisting that I answer to your preference.

 

When you do not call me Pearson,

You’re insinuating that my preference (& thus, my presence) lacks worth and value.

 

BUT–Not all instances fall into these categories. It’s reasonable if you’ve never met me to be unaware (though it is prevalent on all of my social accounts and my supervisor is even has it “  “ on our website).  In those cases, I politely insert a “I prefer just Pearson”.

It’s when we’ve been colleagues or familiar associates for a substantial period of time and there seems to be a deliberate disregard for my name.

 

And to be clear, Pearson is actually and legally my name—so this isn’t that difficult.

 

BUT sometimes it is—for other people and even for myself at one point.

 

When I began my job search after graduate school, I did not articulate my preference for Pearson. Honestly, I didn’t know how to articulate it on resumes, cover letters, and applications. Once I accepted a position at the University of Tennessee, I didn’t know how to make the transition from my application materials to me—so I never said anything. For 11 months, I never corrected anyone—even though I was internally cringing every time some called me Courtney (even worse when it started getting shorten to “Court”).

 

I never felt comfortable to advocate for who I was authentically so, though I devoutly hold the above mentioned sentiments, I didn’t articulate them towards my former UT colleagues. Instead, a small piece of me resents the person who never spoke up for herself. So when I do it now—I do it unapologetically and I don’t feel bad.

 

When I transitioned to Tallahassee, I was fortunate to have a former Orientation Leader currently working as an intern for the office I was joining as well as a supervisor who took one look at my Facebook account and the moment I walked in said “So you prefer to go by Pearson, right.” And in that small moment, I felt like I had found my voice. I immediately exclaimed, “YES!”

 

Writing this narrative is a whole new level of learning how to advocate for myself. Though, I have formed new and very meaningful relationships which have produced some affectionate nicknames reflective of their affinity (FSU students have adopted Lil’ Pea—which is hilarious) or even an office shorthand (it’s not atypical for my supervisor or colleague to address me as just “P”), over the past few months, I’ve committed to correcting people that do no address me by my preference and I will continue to do so, UNAPOLOGETICALLY!

 

So, it’s just Pearson (like the book company).